Something has happened to me. Something drastic. For some reason, I want to achieve perfection in everything I do, every aspect of my life. What is with that?
In my teens I had this perfect attitude of "This is what I can do, this is what I want to do, and this is what you will get from me" and I did not have this burden of caring about performing greatly at everything... my report cards were are a wonderful example of that. And I did not mind.
Now, NOW all of a sudden I have this desire to be perfect! Geez.
This dawned on me last night (after watching the Biggest Loser) when I said to Hubs:
"I think I want a treadmill... but I don't actually want it in the house because it is ugly. I just feel like I need to run and I don't want to do it out side with the creepy men" (because its true, the men in my town are not subtle)
"But, you're fine, you look great!" Said Hubs
"...But I want to exercise to be healthy, not to be hot!" Men, always thinking of the same thing...
Then I realized the demands I am putting on myself. I want to be physically fit, cook fabulously tasting, healthy, and cheap meals, be a great teacher, and be a great wife. At home, it kills me that I can not keep up with the house... the cleaning, the decorating, the laundry.
I wish I could stay home, and be a super-home keeper.
And I love doing all of these things! But I am feeling overwhelmed at tired. So then I give Hubs a list of things to accomplish (aka: the list of everything I do not want to do). And he is a big help. He is so sweet.
But I still want to do more! I think there was a switch that went off in my head when I got married that did this all to me.
Any working women out there with advise?
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